Despite being neighbors, Canadians and Americans have a lot of differences - and they’re not afraid to laugh about them. Some are subtle, some are hilarious, and some are downright mystifying. Most involve Canada’s fascination with maple syrup and snow - two things Americans can never quite compete with. And of course, they are so polite it makes Americans uncomfortable. So whether it's moose in the local shop or buses saying sorry - social media has had a field day, and these are some of the funniest posts out there.
Canadians Apologize for Everything (Including Apologizing! )
It’s an ongoing joke that Canadians are the nicest people in the world, and that’s because they really do have the best manners - something that can’t necessarily be said for Americans. Where Americans curse, Canadians apologize.
Where big American cities are known as being unfriendly - there is no city big enough in Canada to dampen their kind spirits. So polite are they that they actually apologize for apologizing too much - although Americans probably would find this level of manners annoying so the apology might be necessary.
They Use Monopoly Money to Pay for Real Things
The American Dollar is so iconic that its green bill can be recognized across the globe. It is also a super-strong currency that’s worth having. Canadian money may be slightly less well known but they have, without a doubt, made more of an effort.
Each note has a different color and a different famous face from their past - it’s like a cross between a history lesson and a game of monopoly. It may be so pretty it seems unreal but really, just like Canadians, it serves nicely to brighten up exchanges.
They’re Not Very Good at Insults
It’s one thing to be polite in person, but Canadians ever struggle to leave anonymous insults. America is known for having stall walls scrawled with insults, and there are none more classic than those that start with, ‘Yo mama ….’.
Where an American, however, might follow this with some personalized insult, Canadians haven’t quite worked out the knack. Nice try guys, we appreciate you making the effort, but ‘Your mom is a nice lady' doesn’t quite cut it.
Canadians Have Their Own Version of McDonald’s
Part of the fun of traveling to new places is to taste the local delicacies. But some of the fun is also knowing that wherever you go - and we mean wherever - you can always find a good old Mcdonald’s. An American staple and everyone's favorite.
Everyone, that is, except Canadians. They’ve only gone and created their own overhyped, over greased, and overly fast chain of restaurants called Tim Hortons. Turns out when on Canadian soil, Horton will always win over Donald.
The Whole Country Is a Snow Globe
American weather is always varied. Every state has its own rules and climate, but wherever it is you can guarantee it doesn’t snow all year round. So whether you love it or hate it you can choose what time of year to visit and then ski or sunbathe to your heart’s content.
But not in Canada. Canada is essentially Narnia - it is constantly winter. So even if your local McDonalds is offering cooling peach smoothies to ‘Beath the Heat’ - it’s probably still arctic outside.
They Are Secretly Raising a Snow Army
Growing up we are told you must always be prepared, and Canadians are nothing if not prepared - for the snow. Go to any Canadian home and they will have all the snow gear and no idea of how cold it really is because they are so used to it.
They are trained from a young age to handle the cold, and in school, as long it’s above minus 20 degrees Celsius (yes we said Celsius, not Fahrenheit - they use the metric system), then it’s fine to play outside. So if there was a snow fight across the border the Canadians would definitely win - and then probably build a victory snowman and do an ice dance to celebrate.
They Wear Shorts in the Snow
Maybe it’s all part of the secret snow army training, but it’s not uncommon to see Canadians wearing a dress or shorts when there’s actually snow on the ground. Maybe it’s because they are so used to it or maybe it’s because they don’t want to be the first to give in and cave to the cold.
Either way, you definitely don’t want to be the first to put a jacket on. And if you do see someone wearing one - it's probably because they are actually American.
Bears Get In the Way of Their Mail Service
We’ve all had one of those annoying slips that have come through the door instead of the parcel we were expecting. And there are the normal options that can be ticked as for why, such as ‘no answer’ or ‘parcel compartment full’.
But it’s very rare in America to see written next to 'other': ‘Bear at Door’.That’s right, bears are actually so familiar that you might find them in your front garden. Who needs a guard dog when you can have a guard bear?
Canadians Have a Third Language
Whole parts of Canada speak in French and as such it’s not uncommon for Canadians to be bilingual. The same however can definitely not be said for Americans, who feel like they’re in Europe when they go to Quebec.
But even when Canadians are speaking English they can be confusing. Not only do they have their own form of slang, but they also have expressions that are surely designed to confuse people, like ‘Yeah, no, for sure’ - which one is it?
Canadians Talk Like British People With American Accents
For anyone who is not from America or Canada, it can sometimes be hard to tell if a person is American or Canadian based on their accent. But there are a few tell-tale signs. Like for example, they will suddenly pronounce ‘Z’ with a D - saying Zed instead of Zee and go all British on us.
You would think in the global pronunciation war, Canada would have America’s back. But no, they jump in with the rest of the world and look down on the way to speak too. Not so polite after all.
Hockey Sticks Are Seen as Lethal Weapons
Something Americans and Canadians definitely do have in common is hockey. Canada has a slightly better track record though when it comes to wins - which isn’t surprising considering their country is practically an ice hockey rink. However, it seems the residents of Canada have got so used to carrying hockey sticks around, that they’ve gotten into quite a bad habit of using them as weapons.
So much so that they even have signs that list hockey sticks as ‘potentially lethal weapons’. So if you happen to pass some people in Canada on their way to a game, make sure that is really the reason they’re holding those sticks!
They Laugh in the Face of Lawsuits ... And Americans
America has a bad reputation for suing people over the tiniest things and because of this companies will bend over backward to preempt this and make sure it doesn’t happen - hence warnings on coffee cups that the coffee might actually be … wait for it …hot.
Canada, however, has no such trouble with lawsuits - or if they do they don’t care because not only do they avoid such sensitive messaging, but they actually use the space to make fun of Americans. Can you file a lawsuit for sarcastic comments on coffee cups?
The ‘Aye’ Gives Them Away Every Time
Anyone doing an impression of a Canadian will end their sentences with, ‘aye’. So a Canadian can try and hide amongst Americans, and may even get away with visiting the sites without being hassled by tourist touts.
But as soon as they speak, the game will be up. Just wait till they get to the end of a sentence and we guarantee they won’t be able to resist popping an ‘aye’ on the end and giving themselves away.
They’re Trying to Get Away From America … Literally
Have you ever actually looked at a map of Canada? It’s quite literally breaking away at the edges into smaller and smaller pieces that are floating towards Greenland - its slightly more cultured neighbor. Fed up of being geographically tied to America, one bit’s floated so far it’s almost touching Greenland soil.
So, in case we were ever in doubt about how they truly feel about us - just check the map and it should explain it all. We knew we had our differences but we didn’t realize they needed this much space!
They Are Never Sure What’s Lying Beneath the Snow
They may have snowmen, snow angels, and even snow armies down - making their snow globe country look pretty happy and magical. But when it starts snowing, it really doesn’t stop until it has covered everything - and we mean everything.
You can think you’re walking up a snowy bank and it’s actually a car. Slightly creepy at times and makes finding your car in the parking lot at the end of the day a complete nightmare …
They Think That 30 Degrees Is Tropical Weather
No this isn’t another dig at their resistance to the cold. Canada uses the metric system, so when they say it’s 30 degrees they mean it’s 86 degrees Fahrenheit - which is pretty tropical (and confusing). We’re unsure as to why the world has to be so divided on how it measures things - weather, distance, weight.
But we’re even more unsure as to why America and Canada, as two neighboring countries, insist on being so different. You cross one border and suddenly your weight has tripled, you’re really short, and it’s a lot hotter than expected.
They Laugh at Funny Road Signs Too
They may be more cultured than us, and they may on occasion pretend to be British and turn their noses up at us. But when it comes down to it - they still laugh at stupid road signs. Americans are known for their bathroom jokes and childish sense of humor.
So when they have whole cities with names like Intercourse, it’s bound to cause some hilarity. But turns out Canadians are just as easily pleased (minus the fart jokes - that’s taking it too far).
Canadians Reward You for Your Manners
We’ve talked about politeness being a form of rivalry, about it being a part of their national identity, but did you know it could also be rewarded? And we’re not just talking about in school when you say thank you and your teacher gives you a gold star.
No, one person in Canada actually reported being given extra chicken at a drive-through because they were polite. No wonder they have such good manners - if we were all given free chicken when we said thank you, imagine what a kind world we’d live in.
They Love to Vape, and So Do Their Landmarks
So, we’re pretty sure America wins over Canada when it comes to attractions - I mean once you have the Statue of Liberty it’s hard to compete. But one thing Canada definitely does have over us is a vaping clock tower.
Actually, just a clock tower would probably be enough to make the list as America seems to of ditched those in favor of shopping malls. But this one actually smokes - or as the healthier Canadians see it - vapes.
Traffic Cones Are a Part of Their Landscape
This tweeter might think that it’s only Montreal that suffers from slow construction but they obviously haven’t been to America. It seems to be a neighborly issue that traffic cones take up residence so long they become a part of the landscape.
So whether it’s installing traffic lights or just changing a bulb in one, no matter which country you’re in, you better get used to waiting. On this issue, we’d say the two countries really have a tie.
Even Their Vehicles Are Polite
In America, if a car drives in front of a bus then you can guarantee that the owner of that bus is going to get off and unload as much road rage on the driver as possible (while the passengers get their popcorn out and settle in for the show).
In Canada however, they don’t only apologize - they change their bus sign to make sure that everyone knows just how truly ‘sorry’ they are. Surely that’s taking road curtesy a bit far - just giving way would be fine.
They Have Turned Their Bus Stops Into Playgrounds
Why sit at a bus stop when you can swing at it? Is there anything duller than waiting for a bus? Well … waiting for a bus in America that is. Canada however has an amazing way of making those day-to-day activities that bit more fun.
And there is nothing more fun than replacing bus stop benches with actual swings. Well, apart from walking past and seeing adults relive their childhood. Definitely puts some sparkle into the daily commute.
They Have Harnessed the Power of the Moose
In America, we have just about started the ‘bring your dog to work day’ trend (if you work in a hipster office that is). But Canada has definitely gone one step further. They’ve started bringing their moose to work.
Canada has always had an affinity with these forest giants but as this post shows us, they can not only get them to help with their work, but they can even get them to enjoy it! That’s surely got to impress your coworkers - rocking up to work with a moose.
The Moose Like to Go Shopping Too
In an American supermarket, you might see a dog run away from its owner, a mouse escape the stock room, a bird fly in and poop on everyone as it tries to fly out again … but that’s pretty much the extent of the animal-based shop drama.
So it definitely amps things up a bit when Canadians have moose that wander in and out of the store. And how do they react? Well, how do you think? By kindly luring it out with an apple of course. How else?
They Say It All With Their Flag (And Some Snow and Leaves)
A flag is a countries identity. As such, the American one is a political map of stripes and stars. If you haven’t actually been to school in America it may take some decoding but the message is there.
And Canada does the same - only their two great loves are snow and maple syrup. So what do they have as their flag? Something slightly more simple - a white blanket of snow with a big maple tree leaf in the middle. Would could be better?
Canadians Are Maple Syrup Hunters
Americans have tried to make syrup and break into the Canadian market, but really, what’s the point? Canadians are like tree whispers who learn from childhood how to tap into trees at the exact right spot to get their golden nectar.
Call them hunters, vampires, or geniuses’ - they hold a secret that Americans don’t so it looks like we’re still gonna have to rely on our neighbors for the sweet stuff. Good job their so nice and don’t mind sharing.
Canadians Are Sitting on a Liquid Gold Mine
We have heard of countries conserving resources like oil, but this really is a first. Turns out maple syrup is so highly regarded in Canada that the government actually has a reserve of the stuff - stashed away with the gold bars and secret weapons.
And we’re not talking about a small collection, they have 30 million dollars worth of the stuff saved for emergencies. And what’s more, is that America actually tried to steal 10 million dollars worth of it! Clearly, we want in on some of this liquid gold mine.
Canadians Only Fight to Help Out Their Friends
The running theme here is that Canadians are very kind and polite so it goes without saying that they make it a rule not to initiate wars. In fact, they only really get involved in any because they are so polite that when their friends ask them to fight they can’t help but say yes.
Nothing like a polite battle! Imagine if they actually did ever want to start a war? With a veritable army of moose at their mercy, they’d surely win hands down.
They Take ‘Love Thy Neighbour’ to the Next Level
While America is worrying about political change, war, crime - Canada is worrying about snowfall and moose intrusions in the local shopping mall. Slightly different issues. So, being the kind neighbor that they are, they can’t help but look over at the carnage sometimes ravaging America with sympathetic eyes and offer a helping hand.
America however is far too proud and usually insists on clearing up the mess themselves - and failing miserably. Maybe the Canadians will send some sympathy syrup.
Canadians Have Their Own Unique Tinder Style
We’ve all seen the classic American man’s tinder profile. A set of three standard photos are selected to show what a tough guy they are: their truck, their gun, and their best friend the dog - what more could a girl want? Well, Canada also has their very own checklist.
Topless and with a hot girl? Check. At a wedding with your friends? Check. With a celebrity at a cool party? Check. Catching a fish? Check. Turns out that as long as you have these four classics then you’re guaranteed success on the Canadian dating market.
They Say Sorry for Saving Your Life
First of all - what actually is tobogganing? From the picture, we think they mean sledding. Anyway, from the looks of this sign, it’s a safety issue and like most signs, it is in place to protect people from harm.
Even this, however, is too aggressive for Canadians and so of course is followed by a complimentary, ‘Sorry’ - just in case anyone is offended that they have stopped their tobogganing fun (and probably saved their lives).
It Can Take Hours Just to Get Through the Door
There is that classic notion of chivalry - a man holding a door open for a lady. In Canada however, this rule is universal. It doesn’t matter who it is, if they were there first if they are younger than you, if they are carrying less shopping than you - you will hold the door open for them.
The problem is, they want to hold the door for you too. So you could encounter a lot of stand-offs with people at doorframes - determined not to be the first to cave. Adds at least 20 minutes to every journey (but don’t worry - if it makes them late, we’re sure they’ll apologize).