No one has ever said that dating is a walk in the park. Meeting new people and getting to know them well enough to decide if you could spend your life with them is hard work. But in today’s world, things often seem like they have gotten even harder than it was for our parents and their parents.
Now social media allow you to stalk basically anyone. Besides, the introduction of dating apps can make the dating world seem very superficial. But these are only some of the issues today’s generation of daters have. Let’s take a look at some of the biggest problems of modern dating.
Now social media allow you to stalk basically anyone. Besides, the introduction of dating apps can make the dating world seem very superficial. But these are only some of the issues today’s generation of daters have. Let’s take a look at some of the biggest problems of modern dating.
You’re Never Sure When to Put a Label on It
If you’ve been casually dating for a while, you’ll know this problem all too well. You meet someone and you click. You start talking, probably texting, until it makes sense to spend more time with them in person. Then it’s like you’re doing everything together and you’re basically never apart.
Everything seems like it’s on track, you start to tell your friends about this person, maybe even meet each other’s parents. The words ‘I love you’ have probably even been flying around (or at least, ‘love ya’). But then - in a crowded room full of peers, you introduce yourself as the boyfriend/girlfriend. And they freeze… it appears it’s ‘too soon.’ After all this time? Yeah, time to start again.
There’s Just Too Much Pressure
If you’re over the age of 25, you’ll start noticing something strange (and at times dangerous) happening to your friends. They’ll all of a sudden stop showing up to parties and decline invites to your spontaneous boat cruises or drunk brunch sessions. You’ll start receiving different invitations - ones to baby showers and bachelorette parties (or, worse, bridal showers) and even, dare we say, weddings?!
It won’t happen all at once, but soon enough you’ll be ‘past your prime’ and you’ll have all your aunts worried that you’ll never ‘settle down.’ You probably won’t want to anyway - because you have other preoccupations, like a promising career, freedom to travel and have fun, and a pretty possessive cat. But you’ll get the ‘looks’ and those pitiful ‘you’ll find someone soon.’ So, if you find yourself taking holiday card pictures with a mannequin, we won’t judge.
Sometimes Being Single Is Just Way Easier
There are, obviously, major perks to having someone special to fall asleep next to each night. It’s much warmer, there’s someone to bring you coffee in the morning, and you have a 50% higher chance of surviving a catastrophe in the middle of the night - assuming one of you is a light sleeper.
But with love and dating also come lots of drama at times. When they’ve gone out with friends and it’s 3 am and you’re not sure if they’ve died on the way home or just found someone else’s bed to sleep in. Or when you argue over whose turn it is to make the coffee and they storm out, only to be seen three months later… Sometimes it’s just way less taxing to stay single.
Pregnancy Announcements, Gender Reveals, and Now… Baby Mama Unveiling??
As we’ve mentioned, social media is just a small part of why dating in the modern world is terrifying and exhausting. But people like this just make it so much worse. We already have so many things we’re meant to celebrate.
Couples are constantly trying to one-up each other when doing things like announcing they’re pregnant. Plus, we now have gender reveals, which are sometimes funny and entertaining, but often just pointless for anyone who doesn’t need to know. And now this guy thinks that a ‘baby mama reveal’ is a thing too - please do not let this become a trend.
Some People Are Just Really Desperate
There are a lot of people in the world, so you’d think that finding a mate would be easy, right? But it’s really not. Because some people want to stay single, others are too picky, and then a portion of people are dating multiple people (without telling the others) and just ruining the delicate balance of the dating world.
So it’s not surprising that people have become desperate to find their “soulmates.” Did we mention the pressure? We already have The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, and have you watched Love at First Sight? Well, this guy took it to a new level when he rented out an entire billboard advertising to let the world know he was single and ready for love. And, hey, it worked for him so, kudos.
Boyfriends Don’t Always Get It Right
Sometimes girls think that they need a boyfriend. Someone to buy them flowers and gifts, tell them they look pretty, and make them feel better when they’re sad. But, to be brutally honest, a proper best friend will do all of those things too, and you won’t have to deal with any boy drama.
Boyfriends try hard, they do. But perhaps girls are expecting the wrong things? Maybe there should be relationship contracts where the boyfriend agrees to remove bugs from the bedroom and the girlfriends promise not to get angry when they try to solve problems rather than just listening and agreeing…
Maybe the Gamers Have It Right?
Gamers often get a reputation for not being able to find a boyfriend or girlfriend because they spend too much time playing online, as the person who took these photos clearly does. But, maybe they actually have the correct formula for life, love, and dating? Could it be?
If you think about it, your games are always there for you. They greet you after a long, hard day and expect nothing from you. They provide you with hours of entertainment but never whine about not going anywhere fancy. And they can’t really break up with you, can they?
Age Is More Than Just a Number
It seems like a funny joke - until you’re there and it’s happening to you. Remember that phenomenon we were talking about where your friends start settling down after 25? Well, that’s not great news for anyone who gets left behind. Once you turn 30, it’s a whole different world of dating.
In your 20s, things are often lighthearted and fun. You can break up with your annoying boyfriend and get right back into dating within a couple of weeks. The saying “there’s plenty more fish in the sea” is true during this time of your life. But - and we can’t explain why, so don’t even ask - once you hit 30 it’s just not the same. There are fewer options and it seems like everyone is taken.
Real Life Is Not Always Romantic
At the beginning of your relationship, you’re both likely very sweet to each other and avoid showing your less attractive qualities. This is how you make sure a relationship lasts - you have to make them love you before they hear you snoring all night, or watch you tweeze your nose hairs.
So, when something like a pandemic comes along (thank you 2020) things can get really serious, really fast. And if you’re meant to be, you may survive living together, being in each other’s space 24/7. But for a lot of couples, once real-life starts encroaching on the romantic phase, everything begins to look a lot less magical, and many end up alone.
Three Is Definitely a Crowd
Ideally, a relationship should be between two people - and if it’s more, everyone should be aware and happy with the arrangement. But honesty and loyalty are not always guaranteed in a relationship, and at times you’ll find a third wheel that really doesn’t belong there. Often this results in a lot of heartache and pain.
Is this another reason to stay single? Possibly. But it’s also the perfect reason to make sure you’re always honest in your relationships. And if you end up like the lady in the middle of this picture, you pack up and go find someone who deserves your love, leave those sneaky snakes to themselves.
You Have to Know When to Leave
Speaking of leaving… Often if someone has been hurt before - or even been the one doing the hurting - they will be very insecure, jealous, and even possessive. But what kind of relationship is it when one (or both) people are so insecure that they can’t trust their partner near other people?
As we can see from this person’s post, their neighbors are not in a very healthy relationship - despite the poster’s sarcastic ending. Clearly, the neighbor is worried that her boyfriend might find the poster attractive, which is really unavoidable in everyday life. It’s much better to work on yourself and mature, and then find a more trusting and secure relationship.
Sometimes You Have to Go Through a Few Frogs Before You Meet a Prince
If you’ve dated more than one person so far, you’ve likely had to deal with someone who ended up not even being worth your time. The person who shared this post must have been heartbroken when they found their boyfriend with another girl at a party. But the second guy? Now he’s a keeper!
The first guy probably seemed like an amazing boyfriend, but he definitely didn’t know how to be a real boyfriend. The second guy, though, we can see him as a husband. This is why it’s important not to give up after the end of a relationship. You just never know when your Prince Charming is about to come into your life and make it all so much better.
It Can Be Tricky Getting Your Guy to Open Up
In general, women aren’t afraid to open up and share how they feel. They do it with their close friends, their family, and typically with their love interests too. But are women simply the softer sex? More in tune with their feelings and less afraid to share how they feel with those they are closest to?
But on the other hand, men have a general reputation for being more ‘closed.’ Of course, not all men - some are perfectly happy having deep heart-to-hearts, but it might take some time for them to open up. And then some guys just think they’re too ‘cool’ to talk about feelings… which can be really frustrating in the dating scene.
Once Bitten - Forever Shy
John has clearly been hurt… badly! According to this guy, he’d rather go through terrifying and painful torture than fall for another person. We can only wonder who hurt him so bad that he’d happily inflict unbelievable pain on himself in order to avoid finding himself vulnerable. And we hope someone special and worthy comes along and changes his mind.
This is how it is for some people, though. Heartbreak can hurt so much and there is no painkiller or bandage to make it feel better, really. Although a love story film, ice cream, and Taylor Swift are good fixes for some. If you feel like you can never love again, or can’t go through that pain again, we understand.
How Do You Really Know If They’re Single??
No one is really looking to date someone who already has a full family waiting at home for them. But not everyone is always honest, and daters may find themselves having to do a little detective work to make sure their potential date is not married or in a committed relationship.
This post makes light of the situation, poking fun at the fact that both men and women may have days where they ‘think’ that they are single - but they’re really not. If you find a potential partner who seems to disappear at times, avoid answering phone calls, or can’t see you over the weekends, you may have to ask them: “Are you sure that you’re single single?”
Being Single Isn’t Always as Fun as It Sounds
Have you ever felt yourself relating to a banana? Yellow, healthy, and a great addition to smoothies? No? Okay, what about this basket full of single bananas that are made to seem just a little bit desperate to be picked up and taken home? Starting to feel that connection now?
You’re not alone. Sure, being single gives you the freedom to do as you please. You don’t have to share your bed with a snoring companion. There’s no worrying about where they are and no risk of heartbreak. But it’s also sometimes just nice to know that you ‘belong’ to someone. We don’t suggest sitting in a basket with this sign, though, it’s not like to help - you’re not a banana.
There Are Plenty More Fish in the See - But They’re All Ugly
Okay, so single people over 30 are not necessarily all ugly. But it may seem like they are when you’re looking for viable partners. The truth is, just as we’ve already mentioned, dating changes after you reach your 30s. For one thing, you’re probably a lot pickier about the people you spend time with, compared to those you kept around in your 20s.
And you’re not going to have time for someone who has no idea about what they want in life or can’t keep a job. And while looks aren’t all there is to a person, you’re most likely also thinking about babies in the future, and picking your partner based on what your kids may look like can definitely come into play.
People Should Just Stop Asking
Whether it’s your mom, your gran, or the nosy neighbor next door, it’s incredibly annoying when people won’t stop asking if you’re seeing anyone yet. There is a lot more to your life than just the person you’re dating, so why is everyone so obsessed about whether you’re going to be single your entire life??
They probably just want to see you happy, but you can kindly explain to them that you’re able to be happy in your job too, or your hobbies. When the right person comes along, you’ll be able to show them off to everyone who has asked in the past. But for the moment, you’re forgiven if you make up a fake lover who has to stay hidden because of their secret mission in Paris. That should stop the questions - or, it might create more, who knows?
Why Is Dating So Much Work?!
If you’re one of those people who is not enjoying the single life but also can’t bring yourself to actually go outside and interact with other human beings, you’re not alone. It would be great to jump right ahead to the enjoyable parts of having a partner, cuddling up on the couch and enjoying a pizza and a movie.
But, sadly for all the homebodies, there are a few unavoidable steps in between. You need to meet someone, often this includes dressing up and looking your best. Then you have to spend time with them to get to know them - depending on the person this could be as simple as going for a coffee or as horrendous as doing a sunrise hike. You really have to decide how badly you want to be dating.
Dating Apps? Not the Best Choice
While dating apps and websites no doubt started as a brilliant way for people to make it known that they were single and ready to mingle, they’ve all gotten quite a bad reputation through the years. Many people will now use these apps as a way to ‘hook up’ and not somewhere to really find a lasting connection.
And just as this post says, you probably know this already if you’ve spent any time on these apps. The pickings are slim, but when you’re stuck at home or just not in the mood to venture outdoors, what other choice do you have?
Not Everyone Is Always on the Same Page
So you’ve finally gotten the courage to ask your crush over on a romantic date. You’re going to cook for them, chat about your likes and dislikes, and finally show them that you are their soulmate. But then, you open the door and they’re there - with their friend!? Someone misunderstood the assignment.
It can be a fine balance between being obvious about what you want and not scaring that person away - for instance, don’t discuss wedding cakes on the first date. But sometimes you have to be as obvious as possible and make sure that they know you’re not just offering up your jacuzzi to anyone who wants to take a dip, but rather it’s a special invitation to them alone.
Perhaps You Need to Learn How to Make Better Milkshakes?
If you don’t get this reference, you may be too young to be reading this, or dating in general - but that’s up to your parents, really. But back in 2003, Kelis gave us the romantic ballad (of sorts) My Milkshake and told us all that it was simply good milkshakes that brought ‘all the boys to the yard.’
It seems someone decided to test out this scientific theory by leaving a milkshake out in their yard and waiting for all the boys to show up. The thing is, though, we don’t really know which flavors or kinds of milkshake works best. If you try it out and it works, let the rest of us know, please!
We’ve Heard It All Before
Pick-up lines are like tradition, don’t get us wrong. There is a time and place for charming and even cliched phrases. But the problem is that for these lines to work, they either need to be really cute, really funny, or at least a little original. You can’t come at a lady with a line she’s heard and rejected hundreds of times and expect it to work.
And this applies to in-person and online interactions. It’s not great news for those who have their list of trusty pick-up lines stored in their pockets. But honestly, sometimes a simple “hello” is way more effective than anything about falling from heaven or the alphabet.
Usually, We Know They’re Lying
And we’re back to the whole ‘are they single’ saga again. This specific meme pokes a little fun at those guys (and the girls) who pretend to be single on dating apps, but the photos you see of them are almost always very clearly cropped.
We wonder who has been left out of those images. Could it be a sibling? Friend? Boss? More likely, it’s a husband or wife and kids, and possibly the family pet too. So when you’re examining images of anyone on a dating app, make sure those photos haven’t had significant others cropped out.
Not Everyone Wants You to Be Happy
It’s hard not to feel sorry for this person’s roommate because he’s clearly not going to find any sane partners while living with someone who creates Princess Diana shrines in his bedroom. Which brings us to a very sad reality - not everyone around you wants you to be happy and in love.
If you have the opposite of a wingman in your life, best you cut them out before trying to date seriously. It might be a friend who doesn’t want to lose you to a romantic partner, or a jealous ex who’d rather see you alone forever. Either way, if you really want to find love, keep those kinds of people far away from your dates, and vice versa.
You Have to Know How to Deal With Stand-Ups
If you’ve ever been stood up you’ll know how terrible it feels. And if you’ve been the one to stand a date up, well we hope you had a very good excuse. To make someone get themselves ready, travel to the agreed date spot, and then sit there alone until they give up is just mean.
So we do not blame Edward one bit for sending an invoice to his date who clearly decided not to show up as agreed, without even sending an excuse. He’s only asking for $8, which when compared to the emotional distress and possible costs to get to the date seems reasonable, what do you think?
You Think You’re Meeting the Man of Your Dreams, But Really… You’re Not
Yes, we're going to talk about more dating app errors so ready yourself. Have you ever set up a date with someone you met online? Maybe a six-foot brunette with hazel eyes and just the right amount of stubble? He’s a musician and spends his free time caring for the elderly? But then you show up and he’s five-foot, turning grey, and hasn’t shaved in months? Oh, and he’s unemployed and lives with his mom?
Yeah, when you’re meeting people online, they have full control over who and what you see. They’re able to post their best photos - even if they were taken 20 years ago - and make themselves sound appealing. But when you meet them in real life, they’re just not as sexy as they seemed. It happens, and all you can do is try again.
There Are So Many Expectations
Okay, so whoever filled out these traits definitely needs to work on some of them. If you’re flat-out admitting that you’re evil, you’re probably not going to have many people calling you up to go on a date. But this is an over-exaggeration of a problem that many people may have.
Social media and dating apps mean we now have access to people all over the world… So being average makes it so much harder to seem as exciting as everyone else. If you’re feeling like your personality traits, interests, and life in general just aren’t working for you, rest assured there is probably someone out there feeling exactly the same - you just need to find them.
People Are Smarter Than You Think
This falls into the same category as worn-out pick-up lines. Don’t message someone and tell them something they already know, or try to be witty - because you’re almost definitely just going to look stupid. Especially if you happen to land in the inbox of anyone who’s a little smarter than you.
Rather than grasping for straws and trying to impress people with phony phrases and tired suggestions, try actually start an intellectual conversation. How about asking which are their favorite books? Or what Netflix series they’re currently watching? Even asking about their last meal would have been better than this catastrophic conversation.
‘Forever Alone’ Is a Real Fear
Have you seen this ‘study’ that claims that you should have already met your soulmate before you turned 21?! That means that you only have those grueling high school years or a little bit of college life to find the person you are destined to love forever!? It just can’t be true.
There have been people who have found each other in their teen years and stayed together until death really did part them, and that is magical and lovely. But we’ve also seen stories of people who haven’t met their special someone until they were retired! We don't know who did these studies, but we’re pretty sure you have more time to find your soulmate - don’t give in to the Forever Alone life just yet.
Up Next, These Celebrities Are Surprisingly Still Single
One would think that being crazy rich and beautiful would make for an amazing life. However, there is a lonely side to this whole Hollywood story. Even though they have everything most of us wish for, these well-known celebrities are still single and emotionally unoccupied.
We guess that you really cannot have it all! It looks like money, fame, and, fortune is not the right formula for finding true love, or at least that's what these examples show us. Some of these celebrities are not newly single, they've been on their own for a while. Here's a long list of celebrities who started 2019 without a partner by their side!
Marisa Tomei
Moving on, here is Marisa Tomei, another charismatic American actress who seems to be difficult to pin down. Most of her relationships were known to the public, as she has dated many popular men such as Lenny Kravitz, Robert Downey Jr., and Christian Slater.
However, Marisa Tomei is currently single and she has been single for a while. Apparently, she is enjoying her life as it is and she is not in a rush to find a partner. After all, she has a very successful career and a happy life.
Coco Chanel
When you think of Coco Chanel you probably think of designer purses and expensive perfumes. But, if we take a look at the person behind this whole thing, Coco is not as fulfilled as you might think, considering that she owns a multi-million dollar brand and company.
In fact, this fashion guru and goddess had her fair share of love attempts but none of them lasted long enough to become significant. Of course, Coco was asked on several occasions to comment on this, and here's what she said: "In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different."
Sheryl Crow
Sheryl Crow has surely gone through some drama in her love life. She got the whole Hollywood and singer career thing right but she can't seem to put her foot down when it comes to love relationships.
Sheryl used to date Lance Armstrong, one of the world's most popular cyclists. After the two broke it off, the word got out that Armstrong used illegal substances to enhance his cycling performance during competitions. The two never got back together and our singer from California remained single ever since.
Oprah Winfrey
You don't really need anybody when you're Oprah, right? It looks like Oprah thinks the same thing. As a self-made billionaire, this woman has everything she wants, except a partner. Let's not forget that she was romantically involved with Stedman Graham for almost 30 years but things didn't quite work out.
Some even say that the two didn't get married because Oprah wanted to avoid a messy divorce. Way to set yourself up for success, right? Either way, being single is not on Oprah's list of worries, since she is, after all, the world's most popular self-made billionaire!
Goldie Hawn
We will start off with an extraordinary example of Goldie Hawn. As one of Hollywood's most popular stars and award-winning actresses, Goldie doesn't seem to have luck in the love field. However, her heart is not that unoccupied. In fact, she fell in low with actor Kurt Russell whom she was dating since 1983.
The two were happy together for over 30 years and they even raised four children. So, why is she on our list of single celebrities, you may ask? Well, it looks like even after 30 years of being together, Goldie and Hurt are not ready to tie the knot!
Matt Dillon
Matt Dillon is a famous Hollywood actor who has been involved in multiple Hollywood love stories. Most of his relationships were quite public but we still haven't had a chance to see Matt tie the knot with his one and only.
One of his love endeavors that is still well-remembered was his relationship with Cameron Diaz back in the 90s. It is rumored that Dillon is now dating Roberta Mastromichele but there is still no sign of any rings. We hope to see this talented actor finally tie the knot and start a family!
Naomi Watts
Even though Naomi Watts has plenty of experience in serious relationships, she has not yet made any permanent commitments. With the way things are looking right now, it doesn't seem like the talented Australian actress will be tying the knot any time soon.
Interestingly, Naomi has dated a fellow actor Liev Schreiber for eleven years and they even have two children together but for unknown reasons, they never made it official. The two ended up splitting but they remained good friends and parents to their children.
Kylie Minogue
It is hard to believe that such a beautiful and talented woman such as Kylie Minogue is still single. She has been through a lot in life, including difficult challenges such as breast cancer. However, throughout all her battles, she always claimed that she is not the type to get married.
Despite all her claims, Kylie did get close to getting married at one point in her life when she was dating Joshua Sasse. However, the two broke up back in 2017 and Kylie didn't seem to be interested in love relationships ever since.
Jon Hamm
The first handsome gentleman on our list is Jon Hamm who also didn't have any luck in finding his life-long partner. Jon Hamm never got married but he did have a long list of lovers, none of whom seemed worthy of the big question.
Jon's most prominent relationship was the one with Jennifer Westfield, a famous actress, and writer. The two were happy together for almost two decades. They started dating in 1997 but, unfortunately, they ended things in 2015. What a shame!