There are a few things in life that are as physically and emotionally draining as a horrible neighbor. What's worse, neighbors can't be replaced—you're pretty much stuck with them unless you move elsewhere, or they do. That couple next door who regularly engages in shouting matches with each other or that meddlesome little kid who has his prying eyes constantly in your direction—yeah, you know what I'm talking about—they are there to stay, and you simply have to live with the fact.
But, trust us, you're still one of the lucky ones. And if you find that hard to believe, well, read on, because here's a list that will make you appreciate your neighbors, and will have you sending over cookies and fruit baskets to them in no time.
But, trust us, you're still one of the lucky ones. And if you find that hard to believe, well, read on, because here's a list that will make you appreciate your neighbors, and will have you sending over cookies and fruit baskets to them in no time.
Potty Garden
Since climate change will make our species extinct in a few years, we're really all for upcycling. After all, who can be against a practice that can arguably help prevent the doom and gloom that awaits? And, sure, a toilet that's been turned into a basin for a plant is a wonderful idea. It's just that.. sometimes, too much of a wonderful idea can be a bad thing.
This particular neighbor—this enviro-nazi—wasn't content with just a single potty plant. Oh no, they had to ruin what was supposed to be a well-manicured suburban oasis by putting a dozen of them out on the front yard for all the world to see, flushing out the neighborhood's collective well-being down the toilet in the process.
Serves You Right, Bob
We suspect that all of this was a result of Bob pestering his neighbors about painting their fence a little too much. Most of us would have simply told Bob to mind his own business. But most of us aren't like Bob's neighbor, who is a master at getting his point across by straddling that middle fence between hilarity and insolence.
"Look Bob, I've painted my fence" was simply Bob's neighbor's way of saying 'look, Bob, you are annoying as hell, and you should stay in your place.' It's creative, really—actually more than creative, it's genius.
Mooning the Neighbor
Sometimes dropping your drawers, bending over, and stooping in an indecent manner to give your neighbor the full moon is just, shall we say, a little too much. We don't want our insult to be too injurious, after all. Rather, we want it to draw just the right amount of injury.
And what can be a better substitute for our fleshy hindquarters than a shrub that's been meticulously sculpted in its shape? Nothing, of course! I mean, sure, it might have taken hours to create. But the reaction of the neighbor in the picture confirms that it was all worth it.
Lazy Holiday
Everybody likes holidays. Classes are often cancelled, and it's an excuse to celebrate. But if you're lazy and you have a neighbor like Bob above, who will nag you to put up decorations, then holidays can be quite annoying.
But pictured is an example of what you can do if you're too lazy to decorate—i.e., you can decorate your home so you won't have to ever again. As you can see, the insane owner of this home threw in some skeletons for Halloween, a wreath for Christmas, and a bunch of Independence day decor. His neighbors probably think he's crazy, but so what, at least he'll never have to decorate for those holidays ever again.
When Fights Get Crazy
If you have a neighbor that is borderline psychotic, it's best to just accommodate him whenever possible, because he might just do something similar to what's pictured below.
If you have a neighbor that is borderline psychotic, it's best to just accommodate him whenever possible, because he might just do something similar to what's pictured below.
What In The World?
There's nothing that pulls home prices down like a crazy, neck-bearded stereotype living in the neighborhood. Home prices will be pulled down even further if said crazy, neck-bearded individual fancies hanging out on his roof for the whole neighborhood to see.
You're probably asking yourself: 'what the hell is he doing up there?' Well, we have no idea, too. All we know is that we'd want to live as far away from these types of people as much as possible.
Don't Ask Us
We have absolutely no idea as to what can possibly be the reason for a huge paper-mâché elephant to be sitting in someone's driveway. But what's certain is that, whatever the reason is, the sculpture must be driving the whole neighborhood crazy.
The damn thing looks real from a distance, and no doubt many have been left befuddled for more than a few moments as they passed by. All we know is that, if we were living in the neighborhood, we'd be demanding that someone explain the existence of this annoying hunk of garbage.
Not The Best Idea
In fact, it's a horrible idea. Not only will his neighbors have to listen to the sound of his lawnmower, they'll also have to live through the sound of his motorbike, as it lugs the lawnmower along. This man clearly doesn't give a rodent's posterior about his neighbors who will be bleeding in their ears because of his red-necked shenanigans.
And, what's worse is that—look at the picture—he is clearly singing! Whatever your views are on abortion, this man surely makes a good case for its mass implementation.
He Is Snow Bad
We get that people need to shovel snow on occasion, we get that it's a grueling job, but please, for the love of all things sacred, don't do what this man is doing! He's clearing his driveway of snow by dumping it right into someone else's driveway, which is no different from someone clearing his yard of dog poop by hurling it over someone else's fence.
Hopefully whoever took this photo had it plastered all over the neighborhood, so this guy's scumbaggery doesn't go unrequited.
What On Earth?
It's like the owner of this house told himself "I know exactly what my front yard needs: a huge pink elephant having a cocktail, and a bunch of flamingoes mindlessly scattered about!"
And if you have a neighbor like that, who has these kinds of ideas in his head, then you're probably better off pretending to be gone when he comes over to borrow some brown sugar.
We've Got A Real Genius Right Here
So this neighbor wanted some security, but (probably) didn't have the money for it, and therefore decided to put the security—i.e., a gate—only where he thought it'd be needed the most: on the driveway. Of course, what he did here didn't bring him an atom closer to what he intended, which makes it so baffling.
We are hoping that this is some kind of joke, or is a misleading photo of the early stages of the gate's installation, because if the homeowner seriously believed that he'd be able to keep people out with that thing, then he is definitely not someone who anyone in the right frame of mind should be comfortable living within the same neighborhood.
You're Not Getting In Here
No, we didn't make a mistake and post the picture the wrong side up. And, no, this isn't a house that's just been carried by a tornado; this is an actual weird house than an actual weird person built.
Yeah, sure, the house is pretty unique. And, sure, it probably gets some stares and adds some flavor to the neighborhood. But the subliminal message the house sends to the neighbors—and to everyone else for that matter—is this: "get lost; you are never entering my house." Which is not really neighborly, if you ask us.
Might Be Too Much
We're not so sure that there's anything to be upset about here. The owner of the home on the left has an excessive, almost erotic, interest in himself, and wants to be the star of every show, while the owner of the home on the right is the exact opposite. So, really, they seem to be neighbors that perfectly complement each other.
It's clear, however, that there's a deeper pathology that exists in the homeowner of the house on the left that explains his decision to decorate his home in such an ostentatious manner, while being unmindful of the sleeping habits of his neighbors.
Dropping Bombs
These guys might was well juggle grenades among their neighbors, since it's just as dangerous as what they're doing here. Hurling objects out the window and risking maiming one of their neighbors is definitely as invidious a practice as anything can get, especially if it's sheer laziness that is causing one to do so.
Hopefully, no one died from the falling furniture. And if you've got neighbors as venturesome as these, then you might want to reconsider your enthusiasm for remaining in the neighborhood.
Donkey Mail
We're not sure who the bad neighbor is here, whether it's the one who stuck this image of a donkey to his mailbox, or it's the one complaining about it.
Maybe both of them are. After all, one has to wonder about the pathology behind someone sticking an image of a donkey to his mailbox, as well as why anyone on the sideline who has no claim to said mailbox would think it his business to complain about it.
Seriously, Really?
One neighbor's dog attacked the dog of another, and when the former threatened to take the latter to a small claims court, well, the latter was none too happy about it.
Of course, it's bad enough that an innocent dog got hurt, but for one to compound his offense by doing a jerk move such as this is really one for the books. Hopefully his Great Dane realizes what a bad owner he is and, well, eats him.
At Least These Two Get Along
Sometimes neighbors prank each other all in good fun. Like what's pictured below, one prankster put a realistic-looking velociraptor outside his neighbor's window in the middle of the night to scare the bejeesus out of him when he gets up.
The neighbor who woke up to the face of this velociraptor must have peed in his jammies thinking a post-apocalyptic dinosaur invasion—a la Jurassic Park—was on its way.
Firefighters Making Fun Of Cops
The firefighters who posted this picture hilariously captioned it with: "Our fire station is next door to the Police department. Pranks ensue."
We doubt any cops were actually caught (although, who knows), but the intention behind it was to reiterate the stereotype that cops keep stuffing their faces with doughnuts.
Looks Like a Good Idea
This is, however, another of those things that we're not so sure about. I mean, would we rather be the neighbor of whoever made this kid-eating snowman, or the neighbor of those kids who this snowman is supposed to scare away?
Either case seems horrible. But if the creator of the snowman did all this because of some peculiar sense of humor and not because he's some Norman Bates-style psychopath, then I suppose we'd take him over a bunch of annoying kids who won't stop stepping on our lawn.
Do You Smell What The Rock Is Cooking?
Clearly, the intention behind this cardboard cutout of The Rock is to scare would be neighbors from even thinking about coming over to borrow some gardening tools, some brown sugar, or whatever it is people are known to disturb their neighbors for.
And it probably works, too, because from a distance, it certainly looks as though a menacing and muscular bald individual is standing by the door, looking out, and is rather weirdly raising one eye brow.
Welcome To Disturbia
This man posing in the way he is is quite literally the stuff of nightmares. We have absolutely no idea what the hell he is doing, or why he's sitting like that dressed as Elton John dressed as Black Panther. But what's certain is that he is absolutely terrifying.
Is he trying to scare someone by behaving in a manner that's so incongruous with normal human behavior? Whatever the case may be, he is definitely not someone anyone in the right frame of mind will want to go near, let alone live with in the same neighborhood.
Freddy Kruger Peeping At Ya
One can literally die by heart attack from this. Imagine waking up in the middle of the night only to see Freddy Kruger peeping at you from outside your window—if that doesn't give you a heart attack, then nothing will.
Of course, if one survived the momentary brush with death, then there is absolutely no reason for him to not appreciate the prank, laugh it off, and plan his revenge.
We're Confused.
We don't really know what went on here, whether someone complained about the flamingoes or whether the flamingoes were put here as a response to someone's complaint. In either case, what the hell do a bunch of plastic flamingoes have to do with anything?
Our guess is that the owner of this lawn put out a few flamingoes only to have someone call the police because of how ugly it seemed. The police went over, laughed at how ridiculous the call was about, and left. So the flamingo-loving lawn-owner decided to put MORE flamingoes to piss off his neighbors. It's a very weird story still, but it's the best we can come up with to describe what happened.
He'll Keep Trying, No Matter What
The neighbor on the right is one of those guys who just needs to keep up with whoever's got the best things in the neighborhood. If someone has a nice new car, well, you can bet that he'll be getting one, too. In the picture below, his neighbor got a new Jacuzzi, so of course he had to devise one for himself.
And it's pretty moronic what he did—he simply got an old bathtub, filled it with bubbles, and dunked himself in it. I don't know if this is his idea of 'keeping up,' but whatever the case may be, he's certainly deserves to be in this list of horrible neighbors.
Getting Even
It's not a bad idea, except maybe for the grandson, who'll be having pooping duties in no time, but we suspect that whoever put this up said to himself, in the words of Poppeye: "That's all I can stands, I can't stands no more!"
Neighbors who intentionally let their dogs poop in other people's backyards are a huge annoyance, and if this sign succeeds in discouraging some of them from doing it, then it's all well and good.
This Has To Mean Something
This picture came with the caption "The HOA (Home Owners Association) in my friend's neighborhood recently threatened her neighbors with a fine if they didn’t hide their trash cans, even though they’ve been in the same spot for over a decade. This is their solution."
It is, we have to say, a wonderful solution. These aren't bad neighbors at all—indeed, the bad ones are those who act as the HOA's sycophants.
He Has Balls
This Reddit-submitted picture had the caption: "Whenever a ball goes into my neighbor's yard, he puts them in his tree so no one can get them back."
Apparently, this neighbor not only dislikes children having fun, he's also sadistic enough to put their toys up on his tree where they can forever see it out of reach. If I was his neighbor, I'd take an axe to his place and cut down that thing.
A Weird Display
It's not what you're thinking; a hurricane didn't come in and trash his Christmas decorations. The Redditor who shared this photo claims that the person who put up this Christmas display meant for it to look as horrible as this.
We're not sure why they would do such a thing, but what we're certain of is that our eyes would bleed out if we had to pass by something like this everyday on our way home.
Potty Driveway
Why is it difficult for people to understand that toilets belong to either the bathroom or a junk shop? It just looks stupid being used as a flower pot.
The neighbors of whoever put this up can't be anything but annoyed about the fact that they have to have the image of a poop can in their brains whenever they leave the house.
Duplex Woes
This is the problem with living in Duplexes. I mean, there you are, taking care of your side of the duplex, only to have your neighbor do the exact opposite.
On one side, we got a responsible homeowner, on the other, we got the Addams Family. So unless you're sure about the people who are living on the other side of the duplex, we recommend that you never get a duplex.
Lazy Neighbor
You know what happens when you get a lazy neighbor who simply refuses to throw his junk in the trash and chooses instead to leave it lying around his front yard for all the world to see, destroying a perfectly manicured suburban neighborhood in the process?
Well, you get headaches, that's what. Also, stress—yes, you get stress. Don't forget, you also get the feeling of wanting to punch someone's face in. Take our advice: pack up and leave.
Straight To The Point
The fence was apparently put up to prevent their neighbor from destroying their plants—that's what the sign says. If it was the owner of the home that's closer to the camera who put the sign up, then, damn, your "plants" are an eyesore that, I'm sorry to say, need destroying.
In any case, we can only surmise that these two neighbors have been at each other's throats for a while now, for such a strongly word sign to have been put up in the manner that it was.
Apartment Living
One of the downsides of apartment living is that you're that much closer in proximity to your neighbors, who will, on occasion, hear whatever you're doing. And we're not so sure who among these two we wouldn't want living in close proximity to.
I mean, one clearly sings a lot and the other wants to jam his nose into everything his neighbors do. We'd rather live in a cardboard box on the street than live beside any of these two.